You know who you are. You ain't rich, but you ain't broke. You're the guy who every now and again can comfortably say, "Fuck yeah, man! Super Size that shit." You've worked kind of hard to get where you are in life. Maybe not really hard, but you've done some shit. Shouldn't others know that? What was the point of getting that associates degree if you can't show off a bit? Now with the new iPhone application I Ain't Broke you can finally exclaim, "I Ain't Broke... Bitches!" Nothing distinguishes you from the truly broke-ass bitches better than the ability to completely waste $0.99 on a blinging ass money app for your phone. In this day and age it's difficult to stand out. Go ahead and make a small investment in your ego. Get your I Ain't Broke iPhone app today, and next time someone's got shit to say about your financial prowess, you go ahead and make them Lincolns rain, SON!

These days, just having an iPhone isn't enough to separate you from the pack. I mean, they're selling them now for a hundred bucks. That's not gangster fly. But imagine this scene; you're kicking it pool side at P. Diddy's house and there are fly ass rap video dancing girlys all around. You whip out your phone and get on Twitter to tweet about how ridiculous it is that your almost broke ass is at P. Diddy's house in the first place. Then across the party you see Carmen Electra, fresh off a break up with the latest tattooed singer dude, she's staring at you like a raging bull. BAM! She does some back flips and shit across the pool deck and lands in your lap. What are you gonna do? Talk about how great she was in Starsky & Hutch? Fuck no! You're gonna whip it out bro, the I Ain't Broke app that is. First of all, it's shiny. Second, it makes money sounds, and money is a natural aphrodisiac. Third, it moves around and will probably distract and entertain most of those dumb ass hoodrats you've been getting with, leaving you free to lay your game on Carmen.

Carmen: "Oooo. It's so shiny and it's money!"

You: "Yeah baby."

Carmen: "What does it do?"

You: "Makes you horny."

BAM! You're hitting skins with Carmen Electra in P. Diddy's laundry room at a fly ass gangster rap pool party. All on behalf of MetaForge Studios, the development powerhouse that brought you I Ain't Broke... You're welcome.